I was just snuggles up in bed working on falling asleep, and this came to mind and I needed to get it down on paper before I forgot it!
Here it is:
My name is Kristina. I am a wife, a daughter and a sister. I am a friend, co-worker and a lady at the grocery store. I am a scrapbooker, computer gamer, singer and writer. I sit beside you in church and the doctor's office. I am a former drug and alcohol abuser. I am Bible believing, born again Christian. And I have depression.
I am NOT a stigma, a statistic or broken. I am NOT lacking faith, my mother's hugs or quality relationships. I am not defeated or giving up.
Depression is defeating, isolating, numbing and draining. BUT it cannot take away from the gifts and promises that God has given to us.
2 Corinthians 4: 7-12 But we have this treasure in jars of clay to show that this all-surpassing power is from God and not from us. 8 We are hard pressed on every side, but not crushed; perplexed, but not in despair; 9 persecuted, but not abandoned; struck down, but not destroyed. 10 We always carry around in our body the death of Jesus, so that the life of Jesus may also be revealed in our body. 11 For we who are alive are always being given over to death for Jesus' sake, so that his life may be revealed in our mortal body. 12 So then, death is at work in us, but life is at work in you.
I am not writing this in victory or defeat, but rather consider this an update from the battle field. I will not let depression steal from me the joy that God has intended for me, nor will I let this take my eyes off of Him who has already won. Jesus knows the very number of the hairs on my head, He made me in His image, and I know that He has a plan for me. His plan was not for me to be defeated, but to be a conquer.
Romans 8:37-39
37 No, in all these things we are more than conquerors through him who loved us. 38 For I am convinced that neither death nor life, neither angels nor demons,[a] neither the present nor the future, nor any powers, 39 neither height nor depth, nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God that is in Christ Jesus our Lord.
Many great leaders and godly men in the Bible knew what it was like to be depressed. They cried out to God, and God heard them!
Here is my prayer for myself and others who have felt the darkness that depression brings:
Holy Father, I thank you for your Son Jesus. I thank you for the sacrifice that you made for me. So that I can come to you without hesitation and you hear my prayers. You know the hearts of men, our thoughts, our fears and our deepest sadness. I ask you to restore in me the joy of salvation. Give strength to carry through the trials that have been put before us. You said that you will not put anything on us that we cannot withstand, I pray that when we feel our weakest and broken that you would show us your strength. Jesus I know I feel alone, but I pray that you would continually remind me that you are with me. Even when I feel like I am in the valley of the shadow of death or hard pressed, I know that you are with me. I ask for strength, courage and joy. I ask this in Jesus' holy name. Amen!
God is bigger than depression. He is bigger than me and my own strengths. I am glad that the Creator of the universe loves me and cares for me.
Monday, January 26, 2009
Counting My Blessings
I listened to a pod cast from Walk in the Word today by James McDonald titled Grace When I am Disappointed. I recommend you look it up. I listened to it at my husbands urging. It talks about how we get ourselves into and out of depression. I won't spoil it, trust me listen to it!!
One of the things that it talks about it how when we are depressed we focus on the negatives, but one of the things we can do to counter that is to think and focus on the positives. I am writing this more for myself than anyone else. But maybe through this you to will be able to count your blessings as well!
My Blessings:
-Assurance of Salvation -A place in heaven -Forgiveness -Purpose -Hope -Provision -Comfort -Life itself -Shelter -Food -My Hubby -My family -Ability to work -Guidance -Friends - Understanding -Wisdom -My church family -Tea -Chocolate -Love -Hugs -Long conversations -Honesty -Trust -Company -Faith -Good Books -My husband's gentle and giving spirit -My In Laws -My new sisters -Sunshine -Snow -Having a safe van to get to work -My health -A comfortable bed -Creative outlets -The ability to read and write -Entertainment -Information -The ability to learn -Music -Dancing -Joy -Intimacy -Comfortable clothes -Art -My cats -Beauty in nature -That I am fearfully and wonderfully made
That is only scratching the surface!
One of the things that it talks about it how when we are depressed we focus on the negatives, but one of the things we can do to counter that is to think and focus on the positives. I am writing this more for myself than anyone else. But maybe through this you to will be able to count your blessings as well!
My Blessings:
-Assurance of Salvation -A place in heaven -Forgiveness -Purpose -Hope -Provision -Comfort -Life itself -Shelter -Food -My Hubby -My family -Ability to work -Guidance -Friends - Understanding -Wisdom -My church family -Tea -Chocolate -Love -Hugs -Long conversations -Honesty -Trust -Company -Faith -Good Books -My husband's gentle and giving spirit -My In Laws -My new sisters -Sunshine -Snow -Having a safe van to get to work -My health -A comfortable bed -Creative outlets -The ability to read and write -Entertainment -Information -The ability to learn -Music -Dancing -Joy -Intimacy -Comfortable clothes -Art -My cats -Beauty in nature -That I am fearfully and wonderfully made
That is only scratching the surface!
Thursday, January 22, 2009
Some inspiration . . .
I have been trying to make a conscious effort to engage in my interests. So today, rather than spend 6 hours on facebook (and yes it is possible) I decided to work on my scrapbooking. So far today I have a one page layout, a 2 page layout and 2 complimentary pages done!!! I haven't had inspiration like this is a while. It feels good to be going something that I love that is constructive!
I had an appointment with my counselor last night and a lot of things are starting to come to light and show me how to work through things in my life. Not to mention they amazing talk I had with my Hubby! My counselor talked about me and my self blame and negative self talk. I am my own worse enemy. Every time I catch myself assuming blame for things that aren't my fault, thinking negative thoughts about myself or wallowing, I am working on turning that around. For example: i think " you are worthless." I counter that with " you have a husband and God who loves you, you are worthy of love." It sounds kinda cheesy, but I can feel a difference in my heart.
Here is what I am putting for journalling on my complimentary page. I am going to hang them on my wall to continue to encourage me to think positively. This is my New Years resolution:
Believe in yourself
and all that you are.
Know that there is
something inside you
that is greater
than any obstacle
~Christian D Larson~
Stand taller
Reach higher
Love Deeper
Kiss Sweeter
Grow stronger
Sing louder
Dance Freer
Maybe this will encourage you too!~
I had an appointment with my counselor last night and a lot of things are starting to come to light and show me how to work through things in my life. Not to mention they amazing talk I had with my Hubby! My counselor talked about me and my self blame and negative self talk. I am my own worse enemy. Every time I catch myself assuming blame for things that aren't my fault, thinking negative thoughts about myself or wallowing, I am working on turning that around. For example: i think " you are worthless." I counter that with " you have a husband and God who loves you, you are worthy of love." It sounds kinda cheesy, but I can feel a difference in my heart.
Here is what I am putting for journalling on my complimentary page. I am going to hang them on my wall to continue to encourage me to think positively. This is my New Years resolution:
Believe in yourself
and all that you are.
Know that there is
something inside you
that is greater
than any obstacle
~Christian D Larson~
Stand taller
Reach higher
Love Deeper
Kiss Sweeter
Grow stronger
Sing louder
Dance Freer
Maybe this will encourage you too!~
Tuesday, January 20, 2009
My Battle
Some of you reading this may know that I suffer from depression. To others this will come as a huge surprise. I am normally an energetic, happy and social person, but there is a side to me that i rarely show to anyone. This is the side of me that is usually hidden behind a mask.
I have battled with depression for about seven years now, it comes and it goes. I have been told that I have Seasonal Affective Disorder (SADs) and when I look back over the pattern of my depression, it seems to make sense.
There are days that I don't even recognize myself. I can't get out of bed, I don't want to talk to anyone and the world feels like it is closing in around me. The past few weeks this has been building up inside of me and I don't even know what to do with myself some days. I carry a lot of guilt because of my depression. I am a Christian, I shouldn't be depressed. That is a lie that has dug me into some very deep holes. I have learned just because I am a Christian, I am not immune to depression, but my faith has helped me to handle it more effectively. But there are times that I just can't seem to "snap out of it" as many people will tell you to do.
Depression makes me feel isolated, worthless and broken. These are all things that I know I am not, but when The Monster that depression is, starts telling me these things, it is hard to not be consumed by it. I try hard to keep pressing on, but days like today, I just want to shut out the world, and be left alone to my misery.
One of the things I do when I am at a low is I push people away. People who want to help but feel helpless when up against My Monster. My husband is one of these. I know that he loves me and it tears him up knowing that I am feeling the way I am, and I wish sometimes I could just turn it off, but I can't. I don't know how to, I wish I did.
I get so angry sometimes, I just want to hit things and destruct something, but at the same time, I have no motivation to do it nor clean up the mess that it would inevitably make. I have a temper, but rarely do I let it out, instead when I get angry I cry. I feel like I spend half my time with red eyes and tissues in hand.
I have been on a lot of different medications for depression, but I have found that they don't help me. I can't feel emotions that are appropriate to feel and I end up walking around like a zombie. One of my biggest problems is lack of sleep. Hence why it is midnight and i am currently writing this. I want to sleep, I am tired and I have a very comfortable bed, but my mind won't calm down long enough for me to fall asleep. I have spent many nights sitting on the couch in the dark or surfing the internet or just wandering my apartment. I average about 3-4 hours of sleep a night and I know that is not helping.
I know my performance at work is suffering because of this, but I am ashamed to talk to anyone at work about it. And I feel guilt about having depression. I work in home health care, and I see people in a lot worse circumstances than I everyday, and here I am with relatively good health, a job and family and feeling like crap.
Right now I am feeling defeated. I have so many things to do, but I can't seem to get motivated to do a single one. I don't have much interest for my hobbies, I feel cold and achy and get headaches almost every day. I also worry a lot. I worry about money, my health, my family, my job, my marriage and many other small things that don't even warrant my mentioning, but they almost paralyze me. For example: We are tight for money right now, but we have food in the cupboards, I worry that if I eat what is there, there won't be anything left and I won't have the money to buy more. It's not necessarily true, but all I can focus on is the negatives. I try to think like "there is food in the cupboard, we will be ok. We could ask for help if needed." But all I can see is the bleakness in my situation.
I was thinking today that if I won the lottery that everything would suddenly be ok, and all my problems would go away. But I know that is not the case, it would just mean that my problems would change.
I think one of the hardest things for me to to ask for help when I feel like this. I have started to, but it takes a lot out of me to ask. I am seeing a councelor currently and it is helping a bit, but I still can't seem to get my motivation back. My Christmas tree is still up and my apartment is a disaster. I am not sure how to ask for help with that without making myself feel like a failure. I am a grown, able bodied adult I should be able to look after my own living space, but instead I have days where I can hardly get dressed.
Once I get on the cycle of depression, it feels almost impossible to break. Right now I am just hoping that is breaks soon before I do.
Every morning I get up, make myself get dressed,put on a mask to go to work. That takes all of the energy that I have to get hrough 6 hours of work. I get home and I am so exhausted I can hardly stand. That is when I either park my butt on the computer or have a nap. It's a vicious cycle and I need it to break. I keep praying, and trusting that this time will pass.
Well now that I have hopefully emptied my brain I might be able to sleep.
I have battled with depression for about seven years now, it comes and it goes. I have been told that I have Seasonal Affective Disorder (SADs) and when I look back over the pattern of my depression, it seems to make sense.
There are days that I don't even recognize myself. I can't get out of bed, I don't want to talk to anyone and the world feels like it is closing in around me. The past few weeks this has been building up inside of me and I don't even know what to do with myself some days. I carry a lot of guilt because of my depression. I am a Christian, I shouldn't be depressed. That is a lie that has dug me into some very deep holes. I have learned just because I am a Christian, I am not immune to depression, but my faith has helped me to handle it more effectively. But there are times that I just can't seem to "snap out of it" as many people will tell you to do.
Depression makes me feel isolated, worthless and broken. These are all things that I know I am not, but when The Monster that depression is, starts telling me these things, it is hard to not be consumed by it. I try hard to keep pressing on, but days like today, I just want to shut out the world, and be left alone to my misery.
One of the things I do when I am at a low is I push people away. People who want to help but feel helpless when up against My Monster. My husband is one of these. I know that he loves me and it tears him up knowing that I am feeling the way I am, and I wish sometimes I could just turn it off, but I can't. I don't know how to, I wish I did.
I get so angry sometimes, I just want to hit things and destruct something, but at the same time, I have no motivation to do it nor clean up the mess that it would inevitably make. I have a temper, but rarely do I let it out, instead when I get angry I cry. I feel like I spend half my time with red eyes and tissues in hand.
I have been on a lot of different medications for depression, but I have found that they don't help me. I can't feel emotions that are appropriate to feel and I end up walking around like a zombie. One of my biggest problems is lack of sleep. Hence why it is midnight and i am currently writing this. I want to sleep, I am tired and I have a very comfortable bed, but my mind won't calm down long enough for me to fall asleep. I have spent many nights sitting on the couch in the dark or surfing the internet or just wandering my apartment. I average about 3-4 hours of sleep a night and I know that is not helping.
I know my performance at work is suffering because of this, but I am ashamed to talk to anyone at work about it. And I feel guilt about having depression. I work in home health care, and I see people in a lot worse circumstances than I everyday, and here I am with relatively good health, a job and family and feeling like crap.
Right now I am feeling defeated. I have so many things to do, but I can't seem to get motivated to do a single one. I don't have much interest for my hobbies, I feel cold and achy and get headaches almost every day. I also worry a lot. I worry about money, my health, my family, my job, my marriage and many other small things that don't even warrant my mentioning, but they almost paralyze me. For example: We are tight for money right now, but we have food in the cupboards, I worry that if I eat what is there, there won't be anything left and I won't have the money to buy more. It's not necessarily true, but all I can focus on is the negatives. I try to think like "there is food in the cupboard, we will be ok. We could ask for help if needed." But all I can see is the bleakness in my situation.
I was thinking today that if I won the lottery that everything would suddenly be ok, and all my problems would go away. But I know that is not the case, it would just mean that my problems would change.
I think one of the hardest things for me to to ask for help when I feel like this. I have started to, but it takes a lot out of me to ask. I am seeing a councelor currently and it is helping a bit, but I still can't seem to get my motivation back. My Christmas tree is still up and my apartment is a disaster. I am not sure how to ask for help with that without making myself feel like a failure. I am a grown, able bodied adult I should be able to look after my own living space, but instead I have days where I can hardly get dressed.
Once I get on the cycle of depression, it feels almost impossible to break. Right now I am just hoping that is breaks soon before I do.
Every morning I get up, make myself get dressed,put on a mask to go to work. That takes all of the energy that I have to get hrough 6 hours of work. I get home and I am so exhausted I can hardly stand. That is when I either park my butt on the computer or have a nap. It's a vicious cycle and I need it to break. I keep praying, and trusting that this time will pass.
Well now that I have hopefully emptied my brain I might be able to sleep.
Saturday, January 17, 2009
The past few days . . . .
Well I have been home sick for the last 3 days. I had a pretty nasty kidney infection **YAY** :S So I have spent the last several days, curled up in bed reading my book. I have been reading the Outlander but Diana Gabaldon. The series is phenomenal. The first book is just shy of 700 pages and I polished it off in three days! My SILs got me hooked!!!
I had been looking to buy the books for the past year, but I never really found a good deal. Well just befor Christmas I was looking on one of the "Swap and Buy" groups on Facebook, and lo and behold someone was selling all 6 books, hardcover and in really good shape for . . . . . . . $25!!!!!! So I asked Mike if I could have them for Christmas. We made an hour drive to go pick them up, and they were so worth it!!! Not only did I get my books, but I also got to spend some much needed quiet time with my Hubby.
I have also been playing WOW a bit the past few days, and I made a Death Knight, she is a gnome named Sungglebear (Sungglebunny was taken :( ) They are a raelly neat class and I am finding them a lot of fun. Kinda wierd to get used to, but I like them.
My cat Wally hasn't left my side for four days now, where I go he follows. If i get up to get a drink, he walks to the kitchen wiht me, if I am playing on the computer he is sitting on my lap and if I lay down he curls up in bed with me. It's like he knows I am not feeling well.
I have started to feel better today, so I am going to try and tackle some stuff around the house. The dishes have kinda piled up and there are garbages to be emptied and lots of organizing to do, but like my SIL Viv said "Do one thing a day!"
Well I guess I should have some brekkie and see to a few chours befor my Hubby gets home!
Write again soon!
I had been looking to buy the books for the past year, but I never really found a good deal. Well just befor Christmas I was looking on one of the "Swap and Buy" groups on Facebook, and lo and behold someone was selling all 6 books, hardcover and in really good shape for . . . . . . . $25!!!!!! So I asked Mike if I could have them for Christmas. We made an hour drive to go pick them up, and they were so worth it!!! Not only did I get my books, but I also got to spend some much needed quiet time with my Hubby.
I have also been playing WOW a bit the past few days, and I made a Death Knight, she is a gnome named Sungglebear (Sungglebunny was taken :( ) They are a raelly neat class and I am finding them a lot of fun. Kinda wierd to get used to, but I like them.
My cat Wally hasn't left my side for four days now, where I go he follows. If i get up to get a drink, he walks to the kitchen wiht me, if I am playing on the computer he is sitting on my lap and if I lay down he curls up in bed with me. It's like he knows I am not feeling well.
I have started to feel better today, so I am going to try and tackle some stuff around the house. The dishes have kinda piled up and there are garbages to be emptied and lots of organizing to do, but like my SIL Viv said "Do one thing a day!"
Well I guess I should have some brekkie and see to a few chours befor my Hubby gets home!
Write again soon!
Thursday, January 15, 2009
Some verses for hope, peace and encouragement
I found these online while searching for some hope and peace, I did find it when I read these, I hope you do as well.
Inspirational Bible Verse: 3
Inspirational Bible Quotes: 4
Inspirational Bible Verses: 20
Inspirational Bible Verse: 26
Inspirational Bible Verses: 35
Inspirational Bible Verses: 41
Inspirational Bible Quotes: 1
"We love Him because He first loved us."
1 John 4:9-10
Inspirational Bible Verse: 3
"And Jesus said unto them ... , "If ye have faith as a grain of mustard seed, ye shall say unto this mountain, Remove hence to younder place; and it shall remove; and nothing shall be impossible to you."
Romans 1:17
Inspirational Bible Quotes: 4
"There is no fear in love; but perfect love casteth out fear ... "
1 John 4:18
Inspirational Bible Verses: 7
Be strong and courageous. Do not be afraid or terrified because of them, for the LORD your God goes with you; he will never leave you nor forsake you."
Deuteronomy 31:6
Inspirational Bible Verses: 8
The LORD gave this command to Joshua son of Nun: "Be strong and courageous, for you will bring the Israelites into the land I promised them on oath, and I myself will be with you."Deuteronomy 31:23
Have I not commanded you? Be strong and courageous. Do not be terrified; do not be discouraged, for the LORD your God will be with you wherever you go."
Joshua 1:9
Inspirational Bible Verses: 9
Then you will have success if you are careful to observe the decrees and laws that the LORD gave Moses for Israel. Be strong and courageous. Do not be afraid or discouraged.
1 Chronicles 22:13
Inspirational Bible Verses: 11
Be on your guard; stand firm in the faith; be men of courage; be strong.
1 Corinthians 16:13
Inspirational Bible Verses: 12
But even if you should suffer for what is right, you are blessed. "Do not fear what they fear ; do not be frightened."
Take Courage
1 Peter 3:14
Inspirational Bible Quotes: 15
Rise up; this matter is in your hands. We will support you, so take courage and do it."
Ezra 10:4
Inspirational Bible Verses: 16
Immediately he spoke to them and said, "Take courage! It is I. Don't be afraid." Then he climbed into the boat with them, and the wind died down. They were completely amazed,
Mark 6:51
Inspirational Bible Verses: 17
Will your courage endure or your hands be strong in the day I deal with you? I the LORD have spoken, and I will do it.
The Effects Your Courage Will Have On Others
Ezekiel 22:14
Inspirational Bible Verses: 20
... say to those with fearful hearts, "Be strong, do not fear; your God will come, he will come with vengeance; with divine retribution he will come to save you."
Isaiah 35:4
Inspirational Bible Verses:
So do not fear, for I am with you; do not be dismayed, for I am your God. I will strengthen you and help you; I will uphold you with my righteous right hand.
Isaiah 41:10
Inspirational Bible Verse: 23
"The LORD is my shepherd; I shall not want. He maketh me to lie down in green pastures: he leadeth me beside the still waters. He restoreth my soul: he leadeth me in the paths of righteousness for his name's sake. Yea, though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I will fear no evil: for thou art with me; thy rod and thy staff they comfort me. Thou preparest a table before me in the presence of mine enemies: thou anointest my head with oil; my cup runneth over. Surely goodness and mercy shall follow me all the days of my life: and I will dwell in the house of the LORD for ever."
Psalm 23
Inspirational Bible Quotes: 25
"The name of the LORD is a strong tower; the righteous run to it and are safe."
Proverbs 18:10
Inspirational Bible Verse: 26
"LORD, you have assigned me my portion and my cup; you have made my lot secure. The boundary lines have fallen for me in pleasant places; surely I have a delightful inheritance. I will praise the LORD, who counsels me; even at night my heart instructs me. I have set the LORD always before me. Because he is at my right hand, I will not be shaken."
Psalm 16:5-8
Inspirational Bible Verses: 27
"It is God who arms me with strength and makes my way perfect. He makes my feet like the feet of a deer; he enables me to stand on the heights. He trains my hands for battle; my arms can bend a bow of bronze. You give me your shield of victory, and your right hand sustains me; you stoop down to make me great. You broaden the path beneath me, so that my ankles do not turn."
Psalm 18:32-36
Inspirational Bible Verses: 28
"Show me your ways, O LORD, teach me your paths; guide me in your truth and teach me, for you are God my Savior, and my hope is in you all day long. Remember, O LORD, your great mercy and love, for they are from of old. Remember not the sins of my youth and my rebellious ways; according to your love remember me, for you are good, O LORD."
Psalm 25:4-7
Inspirational Bible Verses: 30
"One thing I ask of the LORD, this is what I seek: that I may dwell in the house of the LORD all the days of my life, to gaze upon the beauty of the LORD and to seek him in his temple. For in the day of trouble he will keep me safe in his dwelling; he will hide me in the shelter of his tabernacle and set me high upon a rock."
Psalm 27:4-5
Inspirational Bible Verses: 31
"The LORD is my strength and my shield; my heart trusts in him, and I am helped. My heart leaps for joy and I will give thanks to him in song. The LORD is the strength of his people, a fortress of salvation for his anointed one. Save your people and bless your inheritance; be their shepherd and carry them forever."
Psalm 28:7-9
Inspirational Bible Verses: 32
"Hear, O LORD, and be merciful to me; O LORD, be my help. You turned my wailing into dancing; you removed my sackcloth and clothed me with joy, that my heart may sing to you and not be silent. O LORD my God, I will give you thanks forever."
Psalm 30:10-12
Inspirational Bible Verses: 33
"Praise be to the name of God for ever and ever; wisdom and power are his. He changes times and seasons; he sets up kings and deposes them. He gives wisdom to the wise and knowledge to the discerning. He reveals deep and hidden things; he knows what lies in darkness, and light dwells with him."
Daniel 2:20-22
Inspirational Bible Verses: 35
"Fight the good fight of the faith. Take hold of the eternal life to which you were called when you made your good confession in the presence of many witnesses. In the sight of God, who gives life to everything, and of Christ Jesus, who while testifying before Pontius Pilate made the good confession, I charge you to keep this command without spot or blame until the appearing of our Lord Jesus Christ, which God will bring about in his own time--God, the blessed and only Ruler, the King of kings and Lord of lords, who alone is immortal and who lives in unapproachable light, whom no one has seen or can see. To him be honor and might forever. Amen."
1 Timothy 6:12-16
Inspirational Bible Quotes: 36
"Trust in the LORD with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways acknowledge Him, and He will make your paths straight."
Proverbs 3:5-6
Inspirational Bible Quotes: 38
"Commit to the LORD whatever you do, and your plans will succeed."
Proverbs 16:3
Inspirational Bible Verses: 41
"The LORD is my rock, my fortress and my deliverer; my God is my rock, in whom I take refuge. He is my shield and the horn of my salvation, my stronghold. I call to the LORD, who is worthy of praise, and I am saved from my enemies. The cords of death entangled me; the torrents of destruction overwhelmed me. The cords of the grave coiled around me; the snares of death confronted me. In my distress I called to the LORD; I cried to my God for help. From his temple he heard my voice; my cry came before him, into his ears."
Psalm 18:2-6
Inspirational Bible Verses: 42
"The LORD lives! Praise be to my Rock! Exalted be God my Savior! He is the God who avenges me, who subdues nations under me, who saves me from my enemies. You exalted me above my foes; from violent men you rescued me. Therefore I will praise you among the nations, O LORD; I will sing praises to your name."
Psalm 18:46-49
Inspirational Bible Quotes: 43
"The LORD is my light and my salvation- whom shall I fear? The LORD is the stronghold of my life- of whom shall I be afraid?"
Psalm 27:1
Inspirational Bible Quotes: 44
"That everyone may eat and drink, and find satisfaction in all his toil-this is the gift of God."
Ecclesiastes 3:13
Inspirational Bible Quotes: 49
"Fight the good fight of the faith. Take hold of the eternal life to which you were called."
1 Timothy 6:12
Inspirational Bible Quotes: 51
"Don't you know that you yourselves are God's temple and that God's Spirit lives in you?"
1 Corinthians 3:16
Wednesday, January 14, 2009
Tuesday, January 13, 2009
My Old Bird
I found this the other day when I was going through some old CDs of pictures. I was so glad that I found it. I had taken this picture a few years ago of my Nana. She passed away on May 1st, 2008. I was with her in the hospital when she passed. Her last few years were not very good, she had started not acting like herself and had lost the spark that she always had. One of the reasons why this picture means so much to me is because it is my Nana just how I remember her. You can see the spark in her eyes, her typically folded hands, the pink lipstick that she always wore and her watch on her left hand with the face on the inside of her arm.
When I worked as a server I had a weird schedule and it usually worked out that I got a few hours off in the afternoon and that is when I would go and have a visit with her, especially in the summer. We would make a cup of tea and go sit on the picnic table in the back yard and talk. She would have me take her to Zeller's to buy special peanuts for the squirrels and blue jays and we would sit and feed them. She was kinda like Snow White, she would walk outside and say "Ok, come get it" and make a little clicking noise, and I could hardly believe my own eyes, but they squirrels and blue jays came in droves to get fed. And they would even sit on the table beside her. If one of them took a peanut from the other, my Nana would give them hell.
I used to take my Nana for lunch and it was so much fun. She would get all dressed up with a velvet skirt, sparkly blouse, her lipstick and do her hair, even if we were just going to Swiss Chalet.
I miss her more than I can ever put into words. I wish that I had more time to spend with her, but I am thankful for the time that I did get. I hope to meet her again one day, but that is something I won't know until it is my turn.
I miss you Old Bird!
On a date wiht my Daddy!
My Nana passed away a month before our wedding, and it was a realy difficult time in my life. She is a very special person to me, and loosing her was like loosing part of my heart.
I am a very lucky girl to have the family that I do. My Dad has always been my hero and even though we can both drive each other crazy, he means the world to me. He took me the week before my wedding to a concert to see Leahey. We had a great time and it was so nice to just be with my Dad. It was a super special day, one that I will remember.
I love you Dad!
I like Peanut Butter Cups!
This is a vid my hubby shot a long time ago, of me eating a peanut butter cup while playing WOW! And my guild wonders what makes me so silly . . . large consumption of sugar!!!
Sunday, January 11, 2009
This is how I spent most of my wedding day! We were married on May 31st, 2008, and it was the most wonderful day of my life! My gown was a dream come true, but well . . . I am short and so to easily walk around, I would garther up as much of my gown into my hands as I could carry and waddle to my destination. I was going through my wedding pics and I saw this one, it made me laugh.
Friday, January 9, 2009
Back Playing WOW!
So my computer cooked itself a few months ago and because of which I haven't been able to play WOW.
The first few days it drove me nuts but as time went on, it showed me why I really missed playing. I didn't miss the game because of the instances, the gear or the graphic eye candy. I missed it because of the people that I play it with. I never thought that through a game I would meet so many incredible people, but I have. Because of WOW I have gotten to know people from all walks of life, and it is caused me to broaden my world view, think about things differently and learn that humor is important.
I play in the guild S T U N L O C K on the Eitrigg server. I started playing because of my friend Lexi. Soon after I frustrated the life out of her because I could hardly run in a straight line, my husband never got to see his computer again! :D Lexi and a few other people and myself started a guild called Elune's Blackguard. And we had a lot of fun, I never new until then exactly how much work a Guild Leader had to put into a guild. You have to schedule runs, figure out guild rules and guidelines, manage a web site, and most importantly looked after and out for the people in your guild. It became a second job for me, and it was at that point that the game wasn't fun anymore. So after a lot of thought I left our guild and joined a raiding guild, that to this day I think i hung onto by the skin on my teeth. It was a challenge being in that kind of environment. Where afk's were actually timed, gear was handed out in almost a military fashion and most of the reasons that I had played WOW to start off with were gone.
And then came S T U N L O C K, and am I ever happy that it did. I had played with Jason and Cassie for months on and off, and I found out what incredible people they are. And I was exceptionally glad that they welcomed me into their guild. The people that I play with are an extended family. They are helpful, caring, challengeing and love to laugh. I find that I can be myself around this group of people without and judgement. And in our guild we have all kinds, from stay at home moms to truck drivers, to military, to mechanics. One of our guilds unique qualities is the amount of women that we have. I would hazard a guess that close to half the guild is women.
I am glad to be back playing with my friends. My Hubby and I have a long way to go to 80, but thankfully we have some wonderful people to keep us company along the way!
The first few days it drove me nuts but as time went on, it showed me why I really missed playing. I didn't miss the game because of the instances, the gear or the graphic eye candy. I missed it because of the people that I play it with. I never thought that through a game I would meet so many incredible people, but I have. Because of WOW I have gotten to know people from all walks of life, and it is caused me to broaden my world view, think about things differently and learn that humor is important.
I play in the guild S T U N L O C K on the Eitrigg server. I started playing because of my friend Lexi. Soon after I frustrated the life out of her because I could hardly run in a straight line, my husband never got to see his computer again! :D Lexi and a few other people and myself started a guild called Elune's Blackguard. And we had a lot of fun, I never new until then exactly how much work a Guild Leader had to put into a guild. You have to schedule runs, figure out guild rules and guidelines, manage a web site, and most importantly looked after and out for the people in your guild. It became a second job for me, and it was at that point that the game wasn't fun anymore. So after a lot of thought I left our guild and joined a raiding guild, that to this day I think i hung onto by the skin on my teeth. It was a challenge being in that kind of environment. Where afk's were actually timed, gear was handed out in almost a military fashion and most of the reasons that I had played WOW to start off with were gone.
And then came S T U N L O C K, and am I ever happy that it did. I had played with Jason and Cassie for months on and off, and I found out what incredible people they are. And I was exceptionally glad that they welcomed me into their guild. The people that I play with are an extended family. They are helpful, caring, challengeing and love to laugh. I find that I can be myself around this group of people without and judgement. And in our guild we have all kinds, from stay at home moms to truck drivers, to military, to mechanics. One of our guilds unique qualities is the amount of women that we have. I would hazard a guess that close to half the guild is women.
I am glad to be back playing with my friends. My Hubby and I have a long way to go to 80, but thankfully we have some wonderful people to keep us company along the way!
Sunday, January 4, 2009
Saturday, January 3, 2009
Some of my favorite quotes and a few verses :
We can make our plans, but the Lord determines our steps. Proverbs 16:9
Somewhere along the ling of our development we discover what we really are, and then we make our decision for which we are responsible. Make that decision primarily for yourself because you can never live anyone else's life. Eleanor Roosevelt
We make a living by what we get, a life by what we give.
Believe it, you are a real find, a joy in someone's heart. You are a jewel, unique and priceless. God don't make no junk! Herbert Barks
My most brilliant achievement was my ability to be able to persuade my wife to marry me. Winston Churchill
A rock pile ceases to be a rock pile the moment a single man contemplates it, bearing within him the image of a cathedral. Antoine De Saint-Exupery
We can make our plans, but the Lord determines our steps. Proverbs 16:9
Somewhere along the ling of our development we discover what we really are, and then we make our decision for which we are responsible. Make that decision primarily for yourself because you can never live anyone else's life. Eleanor Roosevelt
We make a living by what we get, a life by what we give.
Believe it, you are a real find, a joy in someone's heart. You are a jewel, unique and priceless. God don't make no junk! Herbert Barks
My most brilliant achievement was my ability to be able to persuade my wife to marry me. Winston Churchill
A rock pile ceases to be a rock pile the moment a single man contemplates it, bearing within him the image of a cathedral. Antoine De Saint-Exupery
My First Blog!
Well this is my first time writing a blog, I have done some vids on You Tube, but this is my frist time putting things into type.
I guess the easiest way to start is to tell you a little about myself!
I am from Ontario, Canada. I am married to the most incredible man, he is truly a dream come true. His name is Mike. I am a World of Warcraft, Company of Heroes, Bejeweled, and Tetris fanatic! I must also admit to being a scrapbook-aholic, and I intend to post some of my works, and inspirations on here. My husband lets me buy all the scrapbooking stuff I can hide! I love to read, especially historic fiction. Some of my favorite books are The Outlander series by Dianna Gabbaldon, The Alchemist's Daugher, To Share A Dream and Sophie's Heart. I really enjoy historically based movies and pretty much anything based in medievil times. I love music, dance and singing.
My husband and I have started attending church again, and I will be posting some of the things that are going on in my spiritual walk on here as well!
Well I think that about does it for now!
Krissy
I guess the easiest way to start is to tell you a little about myself!
I am from Ontario, Canada. I am married to the most incredible man, he is truly a dream come true. His name is Mike. I am a World of Warcraft, Company of Heroes, Bejeweled, and Tetris fanatic! I must also admit to being a scrapbook-aholic, and I intend to post some of my works, and inspirations on here. My husband lets me buy all the scrapbooking stuff I can hide! I love to read, especially historic fiction. Some of my favorite books are The Outlander series by Dianna Gabbaldon, The Alchemist's Daugher, To Share A Dream and Sophie's Heart. I really enjoy historically based movies and pretty much anything based in medievil times. I love music, dance and singing.
My husband and I have started attending church again, and I will be posting some of the things that are going on in my spiritual walk on here as well!
Well I think that about does it for now!
Krissy
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